Thursday, June 10, 2021

Fast Tag FUll KYC Upgrade

If you face the situation of not able to top up your Fast Tag (NICT) because you are on limited KYC, follow these steps to upgrade to full KYC

1. Contact your wallet provider for the full KYC form. The form is wallet vendor specific

2. Down load the form

3. Print the form

4. Fill in the form providing all required details 

5. Don't forget to affix photograph on the form and cross sign

6. Affix your signature at required places

6. Take photo copies of documents for verification 

7. If you are providing Aadhar as a document for verification, be sure to read and know that it is voluntarily provided.

7. Attest the documents with your sginature.

8. Scan them all again, including the form.

Send all the documents to NICT at

NICT - House

Plot No. EB- 109, Scheme no. 94, 

Opp. Bombay Hospital (Service line), 


Madhya Pradesh- 452010

0731 - 2448800


Send all scanned copies and pages of the form to and CC to your wallet provider.

Monday, May 17, 2021

The corona home care diaries

Disclaimer: This is not an expert advice but a written down version of an experience. So do tax your brains and use your judgement

I was not in the best of minds after losing a couple of friends to covid-19 and learning that a few more people I know are affected by Covid-19. Then the shock wave hit me with the knowledge of Best half and my children being affected by covid. Soon I had 3 very (but not serious condition) ill people at home and I was spared the infection. The onus fell on me to handle a situation that was at once scary and laborious. In such times, one turns towards kith and kin for comfort and succour; but from that direction only despair and doomsday messages were forthcoming. Not very helpful. One even sent a meme of a drowning person and a bystander suggesting to keep the spirits high. So with a first step (after rolling the sleeves), I plunged into covid home management. Through the days a few close friends kept watch over me. Just that they called or messaged me was enough to keep the spirit high.They even addressed my sense of humour. More I could not ask of them. I did not inform parents or close relatives about what has transpired. My mom would have taken another upavasam to make the gods suffer for my trouble. So, what do you do when corona hits home and you are the caretaker? Some learning and a lot of wisdom I learnt which I think can help. 

  1. You need help and assistance. ASK and if needed pay. You cannot do this alone. Stop trying to be a hero. Heroes of this kind get people killed.
  2. Stop being a jerk, get everyone at home tested and not just the ones showing symptoms 
  3. Stop trying to figure out how they got infected. You will NOT find the answer. Even if you do, you might not like the answer.
  4. Consult a doctor. No! Your internet search and forwarded info on whatsapp is not research. it is stupidity. Consult point #1.
  5. Prepare a airy bright room with comforts (preferably with attached bathroom) like a laptop, wifi access, books for the infected people to isolate without feeling left out.
  6. Quit whatsapp groups. Most of them dont help you when you need it. Even after you tell folks on it to stop sending doomsday msgs, criticism of country's handlng of covid, memes of bad taste; you are bombarded by them. If you are glutton for punishment, stay on. 
  7. Stop following twitter, face book or what ever is your poison
  8. Lock the liquor cabinet and throw the key; you don't have the luxury of going into a drunk stupor.
  9. Get a lot of sanitizer.
  10. Stock up on emergency foods and caffeine. 
  11. Get a good quality thermometer and oxy-meter (your doctor will advice you to). Remember there is a difference between inexpensive and cheap. Choose your side carefully. You want to be sure of the reading.
  12. Once you have the above two equipment; learn how to use them and understand the readings as advised by your doctor and not by your internet search or whatsapp university study. Stop being a jerk.
  13. Don't stock oxygen, medicines unless told to do so It was quite difficult getting my hands on medicines since people without any issues were buying them handful at a time. You are an abominable waste of a human specimen if you hoard medication.
  14. If possible get food delivered home. Not from a restaurant but from a home caterer. You would need a balanced diet too and not just fat and protein.
  15. Keep washing used dishes. It is easier to manage a limited quantity of dishes than doing so in bulk.
  16. Keep washing those clothes and sheets
  17. Be hygienic and wash yourself too. A two day veshti is bad news.
  18. You are not infected; you are not in isolation; so wear that damn mask all the time. It will not kill you and will also not make your mouth resemble a pithecanthropus. In case that is your primary worry; it is worth to your family to be rid of you.
  19. When you get a break - sleep. Dont play selfie-selfie or some thing else with digital equipment. No you don't need stress busters. You will need sleep and rest.
  20. Work can wait or will be done by some else. Call your manager or skip level and explain the situation and why you cannot attend to your employment obligations.
  21. At this point, you family needs you full time. So much that you will have forgotten if you have had food.
  22. Happiness comes in small sizes. Become a alpa-santoshi. Celebrate small things, laugh at idiot jokes. What ever helps you smile you through the day - do that

This event in life taught and reinforced the belief that the collective is stupid and a few wise people are the reason I want to continue existence. To these few people I do a "naked head respect showing" i.e. नतमस्तक नमन

  1. A big thank you to my colleagues and  team members who ensured that I will not be missed and took on my employment obligations in addition to their own
  2. A big thank you to Soni, Kunju Sane, Renu and Karan, Babu bhai who kept messaging, calling, delivering stuff  to me through my days. Everyone SHOULD have the friends like I do.
  3. A big thank you to Dr. Sonali and Dr. Vijay Laxmi, our doctor who nagged me to keep sending signs of life in the form of daily temparature and oxygen level readings.
  4. A big thank you to Suchita, the pharmacy lady who made sure that I did not fall short of medicines (although they were delayed by a dosage). Some way or other she made sure we got the medicines.
  5. A big thank you to Sonali, the person who ensured we never stayed hungry.

Thursday, September 24, 2020

Old Tales - Devi Amma to the rescue

DISCLAIMER: I am not taking lessons in moral science or decrying any religion or faith or beliefs, so please just ensure that you drink a a good quantity of sense of humor before starting to read
This is a lore which came to me very recently and amma gave me a TL;DR version which goes 

This temple is not your dad's but someone named "in fond memory of some one who once had a life".

Full story (with lot of ice gola and golgappa)

Long long ago, so long ago, nobody knows how long go, but definitely not very long ago, somewhere near present day Coimbatore Shanmuga, Vinayagar and Ayyappa were playing in a new Shiva temple. Unlike temples of old this was a shiny concrete affair. Shiva and Devi were snoozing in the garbhagudi (sanctum).

Seeing appa and amma sleep, Shanmuga called his younger brothers. "Deyi Mani! Deyi Ganu! engada thoongindirukkal (where are you guys sleeping)? Eppa pathavulum aravanai puliyodharai daana? Stop eating aravana and puliyodharai all the time. Lets go play. Amma and appa are sleeping. No one to tell us dont do this, don't do that. I will also ask that Nandi and Bhairava to warn us when amma or appa wake up". Kanna Parvani (Parvani, shanmuga's peacock, his trusted vahana/mount) please squawk when amma or appa wakes up. If you sleep again like y'day no more snake snacks for you. Mind it! 

    Nyaan ningalude kude Kalikunalla(I will not play with you guys) said Ayyappa. Ganu huffed and said "there he goes again in Malayalam- Tamil buddy! Tamil!" Ayyappa repeated in Tamil that he did not want to play with them. Suddenly Parvani squawked so loudly that the lord of the gods woke from his slumber and came out running thinking that his kannukuttis (little calves) were in danger. Shanmuga turned to Parvani and asked "Kanna Parvani! yenda? yen? (why da? why?)". Parvani replied, "lord, I was doing mike testing 1, 2, 3". Shiva roared and gave him a hard knock on the head with the end of his trisoolam; turned to his kids and said "kanna! can you chaps just give us 1 day's sleep. Devi wants to binge-watch Kaliyuga from the beginning". All three of them said "Sorry appa! We will also take a nap." The lord of the gods gave an enigmatic smile and went back into the garbagudi. 

The three of them waited for the door to close and as soon as the door closed, Shanmuga and Vinayagar turned to Ayyappa and asked why will you not play with us? Ayyappa asserted that the two of them don't play fair. "First you said let's race riding each of our mounts. Your Parvani and Mooshik ran away when I came riding a tigress. So you cancelled the game and now you want to race without animal mounts. Tcha! Hutt! I don't want to play with you", pouted Ayyappa. Now Shanmuga and Vinayagar felt sorry for their attitude towards their anujakumaran and asked him what he would like to play?Ayyappa suggested to climb atop the temple structures. He said "It has been some time since we appreciated the art and architecture". Shanmuga and Vinayagar rued their decision; but they were gods and god-children, and they could not go back on their word and now they had to play Ayyappa's game of study art and architecture! and that too on a shiny concrete affair. Not very interesting. But they would not give up. Yet! And they looked around for the first structure to climb and their eyes fell on the gold leaf covered dwajastambam (flag pillar) and their eyes fully reflected their mischief. They turned to Ayyappa and said, "ok, let's start with studying the dwajastambham, We can use any implements to do the climb".  Shanmuga called for Parvani; climbed on his back and asked him to fly up to the top of the pillar while keeping his beak shut. Parvani had this useless uncontrollable desire to squawk during his short bursts of flight. Now Vinyagar using his 4 hands (chaturbuja) started ascending the pillar on his own. The two  reached the top of the pillar one after the other; Vinayagar was tugging at his tusk. He wanted to poke Shanmuga for cheating. But to their surprise, they noticed Ayyappa seated on top of the pillar, calmly eating aravana. Vinayagar forgot his irritation and said "Deyi Mani, enakkum thada aravanai(give me also)". They sat slurping aravanai and did not notice the flag pillar leaning out slowly. The  pillar could have supported may be one god, but three gods and one mount was one too many and started crumbling outward. it crashed into the gopuram (tall structure on gate) with a resounding crack. Parvani gave a competing alarm squawk. Jagatjanini came out as Bhadrakali; blue with red tongue lolling.  She broke the heavy door and wrought iron gate of the garbhagudi; She couldn't be botherd about the niceties like opening doors and gates properly when she was all worried and and angry thinking that some one was trying to harm her children. She screamed - "evan da angey (who is there?)" - Ayyappa, Shanmuga and Vinyagar on cue responded in unison "thillana thillana". The Bhadrakali gave way to Bhavasagaratarini. She sat down and collected the children in her lap and started crooning a lullaby when she noticed the fallen pillar and the crumbled gopuram. She asked who did this? Vinayagar and Shanmuga as was their wont pointed to Ayyappa and said he did. He climbed on top to eat aravana when it fell. She asked Ayyappa why did you climb the pillar and whom did you ask? Ayyappa pouting at the other two asked "It is my appa's temple. Why should I take anybody's permission". Bhavasagaratarini smiled and said, it is not your appa's temple. it is someone else's. Then whose temple is this they asked in unision. See that broken plinth over there. See a name written on it. On the plinth was written "in fond memory of ..." . The temple belongs to that maanga madayan (mango idiot or aam admi) and his children. It is not your Appa's temple. Ayyappa said sorry and nestled in her lap for his afternoon nap. The other two also nestled with a contended sigh! They could always win over their mother. With a wave of her hand, Devi restored the gopuram and flag pillar. Vinayagar asked "why did you repair the temple"? She said it is my husband's temple, how can I let it be broken. Shanmuga on cue (he always like to point out things), "just now you said it belonged to a maanga madayan and now you say it is appa's. Which is it?" The Jaganmata gave him a smile and said "you are kids, you wont understand meta-metaphysics"

Note: Fans of Rajnikanth will readily grasp the relation between "evan da angey" and "thillana thillana"

Sunday, August 28, 2016

Totally biased opinions formed in a 7 day road and rail trip

I went on a vacation trip to ostensibly attend a wedding and conduct a religious ceremony and I was to go all the way by train but as events unfold I went on a road and rail trip. By my dates and times folly my best half and the apples of my two eyes were also subjected to this road and rail trip. My car Bhadra took us around and brought us home safe.

Pune Bengaluru by road 
Bengaluru Chennai by train
Chennai Vaitheeswaran Chennai by Train 
Chennai Bengaluru by train
Bengaluru Hubli by road
Hubli Pune by road.

Hubli happened on a whim and knowledge that there were two old temples within it's vicinity. Anyway this is not a trip diary but a series of observations and a unfounded confounding opinion based on those observations. The onward trip was uneventful but for being flagged by the Karnataka Highway patrol cop for over-speeding. I was only on 90KMPH. Alright! alright! I was on 120KMPH. But this chap, he was from a different planet. He was very polite, actually friendly and even addressed me as "Sir". Took penalty amount, gave me receipt and sent me with a gentle warning "drive slowly". My experience with policemen has been far and few and they were not exactly something I would reflect upon fondly. But this one blew my top figuratively speaking. 

Did you know that you can easily tell that you cross over the border from Karnataka or Maharashtra by the time you take at the toll booth. Karnataka side toll booths (why do they have so many of them?)sent you on your way always in less than 5 minutes even if they were couple of windows short of their Maharashtra counterparts. Maharashtra toll booths would take about 10 minutes. Don't ask my why, just happened so.  But then again, Karnataka had more toll points? Itna kya toll lerain bawa? 

Coming to the highways Both side the roadways were well made except for some part of the Maharashtra side where there was WIP.  On the Maharashtra various sign boards pleaded to keep the roads clean per Swach Bharat Abhyan, yet folks threw litter outside their vehicles which then bounce of windows and hoods of automobiles behind....Tch! Tch! Tch! No sense of care at all. The Karnataka side highways had no such board but there was no littering as well.

Cafe coffee day and Kamath group of Hotels seemed to do good business along NH4 (AH47).  How do they manage to keep the  loo so clean and pristine. Missed them a lot (especially because of clean loo) on the Maharashtra side. Talking about Pune and Bengaluru, the citizenry of both cities would be Kumbh mele mein bichde bhai if the sole parameter was to be traffic sense. Both sides drive and ride equally crazy. Bengaluru a notch more I dare say. Bengaluru mein road kiross karna hai na bawa, tho pir Ola ya Uber bulao. Ok Ok! That was my Hyderabadi side exaggerating. Look at their brethren in Chennai; Seem (operating word is SEEM) very orderly in main roads and go moto-cross crazy in inner roads i.e. if you can distinguish between the two. En chennai peepul, come to Pune for training. Wait! Send your traffic police for training so that they can learn how to do nothing when people jump signals.

But why was Southern railways trying to shove Hindi into the minds of Chennai folks with "One hindi word a day". Half the chennai population (C'mon Hyderabadi exaggeration) can beat you dry in Hindi examinations.

On the return leg, I took a break at Hubli instead of driving all day. Learnt that there are a couple of old temples that were being restored by ASI. So went in search of them. Chandramouleshwar was easy to find, but Banashankari gave me trouble. Why are there so many Banashankari in Hubli? Now the temples are so situated that you will miss them even  when you see them at the end of your nose.

Friday, November 21, 2014

Lessons from an unexpected quarter - 2

Date: Long long ago
Location: Signal at Jehangir Hospital, Pune
Teacher: Traffic police constable

Twas a balmy summer morning and I was perspiring under my helmet, my hair seems to have plastered 15 minutes into the ride to work yet I was feeling exhilerated riding my bike-Viru. I had just run over a mobile phone of a person suffering from obtuse phoneckitis and feeling as satisfied after a tot of oldmonk and black coffee. I was nearing the signal just beside my workplace; the signal was green, I increase speed and  making a mad rush(I know! sigh!). I reached a few meters from the junction, the light turns to amber when I throttled from ridiculous to ludicrous speed and crossed the signal just after the light turns red ( I still know, stupid right!?). Just outside my office gate, I get flagged by a portly, uniformed, tobacco crushing, head nodding to the right and yelling all the time "yae ikkde ikkde" traffic constable. At this point the universe was going "serves you right bugger". I manage to stop without hitting him, he gives me a look which deemed me lower than the lowest of life forms and pointed to the inspector standing by. He had already taken the  key from Viru. I get down, put the bike on the stand and walk to the inspector who gives me a 1/2 a millisecond look and issues me a challan. I don't even remember the amount written on it. All this was the context. Now for the learning.

I yell why did you let others pass by and only get hold of me. Yeah! I still know I was being a jerk. This time the inspector gives me a 1 second look and returned to whatever he was doing. Twas as if he thought of me as a WOT-waste of time. As if on cue, the portly, uniformed, tobacco crushing, head nodding to the right and yelling all the time "yae ikkde ikkde" traffic constable takes over smoothly. I had already pumped myself to my pretend irate best and was not ready for what transpired next. The conversation went thus-

Constable: तुम  हॉटेल में खाने जाते हो?
Do you go to a restaurant?
Me: बहुत बार( I was not married yet)
Lots of times.
Constable: मेनू में बहुत आइटम होंगेः नै ?
The menu must have listed a lot of items, isn't it?
Me: हाँ  (All confused, where was this conversation going, I get my guard up. I still wasn't ready for the boom to be lowered)

Constable: जितने आइटम है, सारे खाते हो की तुम चुन्नथे हो क्या खाना है?
Do you eat all the items listed or do you make a choice?

Now how does one beat that. I dropped all of my pretenses, calmly make my payment, get my keys, start my viru, get on it and go to work and my life.

Sunday, February 02, 2014

Lessons from an unexpected quarter - 1

Date: Forgotten
Location: one of the many malls in Pune
Teacher: One of the security guards in a store in the mall.

We had made some purchases in one store in the mall and we went to this cloth store where we deposited the bags containing our earlier purchases at the baggage check counter. We went in, shopped some and came out to claim our checked baggage. I gave the guard manning the baggage depository my "reminder token" (which I got when I deposited my bags earlier). He went searching in the beehive which was the "depository" and time passed (not more than a minute) and I was getting pensive when he return with some bags. He handed me a couple of bags (huge ones at that). I told him that these are not mine. He took a look at the reminder token and picked these bags and went back into the beehive. Another minute passes and he comes with my bags. I remarked that "If I had not noticed, I would have taken the wrong bags, but what would happen when the rightful owner turns up. He would have berated him and the seven generations before him with a bunch of colourful abuses. He looks me in the eye (did I see a twinkle in his eye) with a calm smile. After  a long pause, he calmly and confidently say "Aisa nahi hoga saab" (Tis will not happen). I am now curious and ask him "aisa kyon nahi hoga"? Again he hypnotizes me with his gaze and the calm smile and replies.
हम ग्राहक को भगवान मानते हैं| और भगवान हमारे सात ऐसा भरताव नहीं करेंगे|

English Translation : I consider EACH Customer to be GOD and GOD will not ill treat or abuse me.

Lesson for me the customer/consumer: I consider EACH customer to be GOD and GOD will not ill-treat or abuse me.

Lesson learnt and more importantly I hope I remember it when I need to. 

Monday, June 03, 2013

Lessons in liking music - Naandi

You can say that I belonged to a genteel poverty period where even a bicycle in the family was called prosperity. In such circumstances, the only music I ever heard in my childhood was boisterous singing from nearby hutments and such. I don't even remember the songs that they sang. 

Long story short appa after much nagging by amma brought home a two-in-one. A two in my dear friends is a radio and cassette player bundled in the same black box. There were no other colors for  be it a hand held transistor radio, a two in one or a table top transistor radio they were all black. With the black box we also got a packaged and bundled audio cassette. Yes only one cassette. Before the young 'uns ask what a casette is, the image below will help mind map. Now TDK was very popular recording media before T-series came into main stream. They were tough and durable.
Anyway back to our story of the packaged cassette. The songs were in english and GOD did not help me comprehend what was being sung. When I listen to the songs even today, I would be stumped if someone asked me to mouth the lyrics. Tis was an album by Giorgio Moroder. Now who Mr. Moroder was or what the song was did not generate much interest in an eight year old's mind. For some reason though the music got stuck somewhere in the deep recess of the mind and stayed there. I even forgot Mr. Moroder's name or the cover of the cassette.  The metallic and robotic rendition of I am left, you are right, she is gone just stuck in the brain and stubbornly stayed there. Later (sic.) or truthfully about a score years later, I remembered the album and the cover and googled for Mr. Moroder using the title "I am left, you are right, she's gone" and came to know that he is the god of Computer disco(old-world title for  DJ mixes I suppose) and Daft Punk (God help me if I understood what that stood for). What more Shall I tell you, Mr. Moroder and the album "From Here to Eternity" was my first lesson in liking Music. 

  • "From Here to Eternity" - 5:58
  • "Faster Than the Speed of Love" - 1:54
  • "Lost Angeles" - 2:44
  • "Utopia - Me Giorgio" - 3:24
  • "From Here to Eternity (Reprise)" - 1:45
  • "First Hand Experience in Second Hand Love" - 5:02
  • "I'm Left, You're Right, She's Gone" - 5:08
  • "Too Hot to Handle" - 4:51
In the album, From here to eternity was the more popular song, but I am left, you're right, she's gone will remain my favorite. 
I was alone at home( Best half and my little 'uns are in mumbai), I was feeling melancholic and bored. I went troweling through my stash (which my best half is yet to declare 'useless') and like a trophy I held aloft my cassette player and after that I could not find Mr. Moroder's cassette. That was a total disaster in fulfilling a wish. I mop around a little, trying to and hoping to find the cassette but to no avail. So I pour myself some rum (old monk what else) and black coffee, pick up my laptop, head to the bedroom terrace and listen to I am left, you're right, she's gone over and over again on youtube. Tis not as good as the cassette, but what the heck, the song to me is soul music. Whats your soul music?


The word Naandi ( नान्दी) means beginning or the start